first order of business: go to myspace.com/foureyedmonsters, click on "videos," and watch all three parts of the film (80 minutes total). and then please watch all of the filmmakers' podcasts, and then, if i haven't totally lost you by that point, check out their individual myspace pages (arin's and susan's). you have four days to do this. friday i plan to blog about it, and i want people to know what i'm talking about. so get to it. after this post, of course. :)
okay. so again, i was watching "confessions of a matchmaker." the woman featured didn't know how to flirt. or at least that's what patti (matchmaker) told her. i guess i agree, from what was shown. patti told her that she doesn't show enough signs to let people know that she likes them. so i started wondering about myself. patti's three main flirting tips were 1) be nice, 2) flip your hair, and 3) make physical contact (touch the other person's hand or arm or whatever). obviously she was just giving her a place to start; they were just tips, they weren't set in stone. i don't really consciously flirt. i guess some people do but i would assume that most people...don't. sometimes i worry that i was too flirtatious with someone i shouldn't have been, or that i wasn't flirtatious enough with someone i was really into. i wonder if the other person even noticed, or if he cared. or if HE was flirting with ME. i don't know. i don't know, i don't know, i don't know. okay and here's something else i'd like to discuss...
guys with lots of chick friends. i meet a lot of guys who have lots of chick friends. i think it's great. i think it's great when guys and girls can just be friends. but i don't quite understand it, because i don't really have...ANY guy friends. i mean, i have a few, but none of them are good friends (except for my ex-boyfriend) and i rarely see them (and that includes the ex-boyfriend) because...i don't know, i just don't relate well to most guys. i don't get them; they don't get me. so sometimes i can't tell if a guy is into me, or if i'm just another chick friend. i think guys and girls, or girls and girls, or guys and guys, depending on the preference, are naturally a little flirtatious even if they're not *interested*. and i'll go a step further even and say that guys and girls in general are often that way, despite sexual preference. i've noticed it a lot. i've been in those situations a lot. so how do i know if someone likes me unless they tell me? i guess i don't for sure. i can always take the risk and put myself out there, of course, and i never had a problem doing that before. but recently i've been involved in so many bad...things, that i have discovered a level of insecurity in myself that i never even knew i had. i'm afraid to sabotage things, to say too much too soon, to NOT play the game. guys say they hate games, but when you don't play them, they seem to have a habit of disappearing or freaking out, even (especially?) when that's the last thing they say they'd ever do.
...i don't have an answer.
i thought i read people well, but maybe i don't. or maybe i do, but we're all just too different, or confused, or too afraid of rejection. they have websites where you can send anonymous messages to people via email to let them know that they have a secret admirer. that person then guesses who it is or sends out a response to who they want it to be, and if you have a "match," then you're both informed and you can go from there. i think that speaks volumes. tell me if you don't agree.
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I think a lot of people flirt without even knowing it, I do it all the time, I have a lot of guy friends but I only do it with ones that are 'safe' like, ones that wouldn't think anything of it/are gay and therefore it doesn't matter to them. I'd find it difficult to flirt with someone I did like because I'd be all 'oh, what if they're creeped out/don't like me/blah blah blah'. I'm not going anywhere with this I just realised, so I'll stop now, haha.
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